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The Thief

Date: January 8, 2017 Author: Angela Nettuno Categories: Reflection 0

First there is frustration…

This precious soul, who would give you the shirt off her back…

Keeping up the house, finding her way to once familiar places…

Programming the Garmin you gave her… and still getting lost…

The tears and frustration, the anxiety…

What is happening?  Who are you?  I don’t like you already and I have only begun to know you…

You are unfamiliar territory to me…

You are the enemy, a thief of the worst kind as you slowly take one of the dearest people to me…

You are slowly but surely stripping her of her identity as we convince her its time to leave her home…

One by one, her posessions dwindle with every move, every stage, every tear…

The cat that she loved needs to be removed as she is forgetting to feed her…

Oh, how I worry that she will freak out as the assisted living manager assures us that it will be ok.

And…   just as they predicted, she never asks about said “kitty” – out of sight, out of mind….

Or about her beloved antique curio cabinet, the last of her precious antiques…

They made us leave it behind as she was moved into Memory Care…  “The glass was too dangerous,” they said…

Again I ask, “Who are you and what is happening?”

Time passes and you are now stealing her of her soul…

The blank stare in her eyes…  It’s not her, it’s not the woman I knew… the wonderful woman, mother, wife, mother-in-law…

The mother-in-law who called me the daughter she never had, the mother-in-law who always showed my family unconditional love…

The blank stare…  The blank stare…  The blank stare…   It’s absolutely heartbreaking…

But she still seems to know us!  That’s something…

Then comes the silliness, the rambling, but at least she’s happy, right?

More time passes and slowly, that blank stare seems to take her to a new place…  Now we’re not even sure if she knows us anymore…

I convince him to stop by…  and as she sees him she says, “my child,” and smiles…

The waterworks flow…  It was a good day, a good visit for my precious husband.  Tomorrow may be different, so let’s just focus on today…

Focus on the present…  Keep her in the present…  That’s what we’ve learned…  It’s all we have left…

More time has passed and now…

Where are we?  Where is she?

She’s not there at all…  My heart breaks every day for the woman we have all lost…

And I hate you more that ever!  You are the enemy, a thief worthy of the maximum penalty…   A thief of souls…

You are Dementia!

 

 

angie

Meet Angela-our founder, former teacher, wife, mom, consultant.

Welcome!  My wish for you …  for your parenting journey to be filled with joy, inspiration, laughter and captivating moments…

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